Do you ever experience the ups and downs of feeling balanced and in control one day and uncertain and wavering the next? Sometimes the balance lasts for days – even weeks – and then you plummet – again (!) – into the spin of confusion and uncertainty.
The balanced feeling is that sense of being sure of what you’re doing, following your plan, knowing what is yours to do and stepping out confidently to get it done. The spin feels well, mentally spinny! It can manifest a number of ways: feeling like there’s too much to do, feeling like there’s too little time, feeling uncertain of the direction to take, what’s next. You might even question if what you’re doing makes sense and is reasonable.
Sometimes you put it all aside, do what you have to do, only to stop or slow down. You find your mental unrest pour back in. Sometimes it’s when your head hits the pillow at night all the thoughts you’ve keep at bay (with or without realizing it) bubble up like a cyclone.
We all experience this from time to time and sometimes the shifts between are longer – or shorter. The question is how to manage these feelings when they do arise? How can you bring yourself to a state of calm so that you can weather the storm?
You can’t really keep them at bay. We can, however, prepare for them and have strategies for finding the calm in the storm so we can come back to balance more quickly. When we’re stressed, things often seem bigger and worse than they really are. Notice when you feel out of sorts. However, when you acknowledge the truth of what you feel, you become balanced and centered. This helps to calm your mind.
One thing that’s really useful is to take a few deep breaths to start. That does slow down you system so you can ‘unhook’ your mind from the turmoil. Ten deep breaths is ideal, but three is a great start. Next, assure yourself that right where you are, you are safe, complete and whole. Really, in that moment you are fine.
No matter what is or isn’t done, no matter what you think feel or believe – if you can accept that right in that very moment, right where you are all is well and you are safe and protected – then you string several of those moments together. Then string a few more of them together, just reassuring yourself that you are really fine right now just where you are, you become fine. Even if only in that moment. Because as you know, that moment is all you have. And if you can be fine in one moment after another, you can change your life.